I know you’re blind, and I cut you a lot of slack for that, even when you have convinced the pet store manager that you can see. But you seem to have a little case of species confusion.
I mean, I can understand if something squeaks like a duck, you therefore assume it is your duck and go about your usual routine of throwing it up in the air, wigging it back and forth and running around in circles with it flapping from your jaws.
The problem though, is the duck you grabbed this morning, was not a duck. It was Precious. She is not a duck. Precious is a kitten.
This is your dilapidated duck.
This is your kitten/Precious
Do you see the difference? Alright, so you can’t see it, and I know they likely smell the same since they both spend most of the time on your bed with you, but really…one has wings and the other has claws. How hard can it be to tell them apart?
So you see, (yes, I know you can’t, it’s just an expression) the next time you run up the stairs in an excessive display of joie de vivre, and grab the nearest soft, fat thing (sorry Precious), you need to stop just for a nano second and think. I know this is likely difficult for you, but it doesn’t take very long to figure out whether what is in your mouth is a stuffed toy or a live, and annoyed kitten, even if she also squeaks.
You can do it, I know you can! Why? Because I saw the vaguely confused look on your face this morning when you spit her out.
(It should be noted that no kittens were harmed in the making of this blog post. He did drop her as soon as he realized his duck was more vocal than usual. )
Count your lucky stars that all is forgiven